Mormon Rules For Dating My Daughters

You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object.

However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist. Let me elaborate, when it comes to my daughter, I am the barrier, and I will kill you. In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls.

This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry. As you stand datkng my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and mormon rules for dating my daughters than an hour goes by, daaughters not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for daughhers movie, you should not be dating.

My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight.

Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is mormon rules for dating my daughters enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a mormon rules for dating my daughters, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chain saws are okay.

Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better. Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless being of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and gules acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me. It takes very little for me to mistake ruless sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a sating paddy outside of Hanoi.

When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in mormon rules for dating my daughters sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car.

There is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine. Our girls are going to kill him. My mom just put the shotgun shells on the piano, nicely daughhters up. Plus mormon rules for dating my daughters is training our two sons to stop any boys that might so much as look at our oldest. My hubby says dauhgters same thing, our daughter is 3—good luck to her!

Plenty of other nice girls with nice families. Good luck finding a quality guy for your daughter. Some of you need to get out more. Alison Moore Smith recently posted… The Power of September 20th. A bunch of hypocrites for sure. Her father who is the strict one has been divorced 6 times. Keep pushing your rules on these young girls and they will eventually go farther away from them than you can imagine.

This girl liked adughters son very much. Now because of her stupid parents he is out of her life. Get with the program Mormons. Let them have their freedom and set good examples by being good role models yourselves without basing it all on a made up religion. Alison Moore Smith recently posted… DC Day Mormon Momma, are you crazy?

They are under a lot of pressure too having to meet the parents and giving them hate is just gonna make them stay clear of your daughter. Try and talk to them about things, make them feel comfortable around the house dafing around you, it will be much more attractive to the guy in the relationship. You could be ruining a possible life-long relationship. Is it possible to screen people for reading skills before allowing them to post? I am amazed at the number of men this offends.

My husband reads this type of thing since these ideas are cliche, though the presentation is nicely doneand he agrees wholeheartedly, as a father of three girls and one who remembers what it was like to be a young man. You sir, are an absolute psychopath. So much for co-existing. If you want me to respect your beliefs, you better respect mine. I feel truly awful for your daughter. I am 16 years old, and I am a male, agnostic high school student with a 4.

If you think that your freaky, threatening internet list is going to help your daughter in any way, you are sadly mistaken. I respect the Mormon religion very much, as one of my closest female friends is Mormon. I cannot, however, respect you. Where is the need to bring up gun violence? Probably not, but I have hope. Or is that the sum of all their IQs added together?

Well maybe you should check a few of the other comments. I would like you to explain to me how your last comment made any sense whatsoever. I make a comment about humor and you somehow relate it to arithmetic? I daughteers you should be questioning your own ability to think clearly. Maybe a little reading comprehension would be a good first step. The kid is GENIUS. Alison Moore Smith recently posted… I Want Daughterd Popcorn.

I, for one, am glad Dylan had the balls to comment on this. It just showed up in the recent comments list. Best dad parody ever. One I can relate to, having three daughters of my own way too young to date right now.


The number 1 danger people usually cite in these cases is the risk that she becomes a 'born again Mormon' so to speak and doubles down when things get serious. You should not be alone in a room or car with a member of the opposite sex to "avoid even the appearance of evil". Amazon no longer supports Internet Explorer 6 or 7, and the site may not behave as expected. My religious background is that I was raised Jewish, but barely basically just celebrated Hanukah cause presents and passover cause tradition. How often does our advice get followed? However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist. The Jesus Christ of the LDS organisation is a spirit brother of Lucifer and you and I - this is blasphemy. Jesus Christ is not the same God of the LDS Church, sorry Josh, you are wrong.